EQ

Definition: the regulation of emotions to improve life
The EQ Factor
Emotions
· long neglected by psychology, perhaps we like to see ourselves as the ‘thinking’ species
· emotions are impulses to act and originate in the more primitive parts of the brain
· emotions and rationality (thoughts) can be in conflict
· emotions can hijack the brain
· the power of emotions comes from our evolutionary past: acting quickly had great survival value
The Ingredients of Emotional Intelligence

1. Knowing your emotions
Strategies

self-awareness
acceptance
learning to follow your instincts

2. Managing Emotions
Strategies
soothing yourself, self-talk, distraction shaking yourself out of negative emotional states
Example #1 Anger
- triggered by a sense of danger either physical or psychological
- you are energized by two waves of energy: a sudden burst of energy and a more general heightening of arousal levels
- anger builds on anger
- control can be achieved by identifying the thought that triggered the anger and challenging that thought
cooling down by distracting yourself
Example #2 Sadness
- people spend most effort on this emotion
- control can be achieved by shifting the mood through
1) exercise
2) cognitive reframing and
3) helping others

3. Motivation
- the master aptitude of emotional intelligence
Strategies
- learning to delay gratification
- stifling impulsiveness
4. Empathy
- people skills seen as a key ingredient in a successful life
- need to tune into the feelings of others as they signal what others need and want
5. Handling Relationships
Skills include:
-organizing others
-solving problems
-making connections
-understanding others

EQ Test